Kendz

i’m actually at my boiling point. don’t know how much more i can take…

6 staffs… 4 clients… 3 weeks… 1 senior… need i say more?

i actually should be working right now. it’s already 10:40 pm, i just got back from cavite, and i have already worked til past 12mn for 4 days straight! i’m pretty tired but what the heck, i thought of something i forgot to write in my previous blog, so here i am, trying to figure out how to start this one… hehe

well, anyway, here goes… as a birthday gift for my beloved, i treated him for a day in the spa… not just any spa, but in Nurture Spa, Tagaytay… I actually had two choices. either the farm in batangas or nurture spa in tagaytay…

according to one of my officemates, the farm was a better choice. the place was better and you have a lot of options (swimming, tour, etc.) while in nurture spa, you just get to have a massage or a facial and that’s it…

in the end, our passion won. passion for food that is! =D after finding out that the farm only offers organic food, i chickened out… hehe i’m not very adventurous when it comes to what i put into my mouth so i decided it will be better if i know of what exactly is my food made of. =D haha

the place was how i thought it would be. it was so peaceful! so peaceful that i totally forgot i was angry with my teddy bear then. haha… it just didn’t seem right to be feeling anything negative in a place full of life and joy.

so anyway, we had our massages and lunch. the massage was nice, but i think they put in a little too much oil for my taste.. my hair looked so greasy. yucky! hehe. but the lunch was nice… i won’t advice that you get the set meal, it’s not worth it. try the kare-kare! yum! =D

okay.. gotta go… til next time. hopefully some time during the week. wah! wish me luck and do pray for me! tata!

i love my job… although it might seem to you that absolutely abhor it, i really don’t. i do enjoy the work, the profession, the sense of achievement and the satisfaction of accomplishing something. that’s why i’ve stayed in the firm for as long as i have. i don’t care as much for the money, but i do care for the intangible benefits i get from my work… the friendship built, the respect i get, the continuous learning… everything.

but what happens when you feel that you’ve lost everything you so loved about your work? what happens when one day you wake up and you realize, deep-down, that you’ve had enough? will you stay or will you go? will you face your enemies and fight or will you pack up and leave?

i believe that i’ve never been a quitter… i finished my accountancy major eventhough i truly hated it… there were times when i really really wanted to shift majors. but i didn’t because i know that i won’t be able to live with myself, knowing that i quit, that i surrendered, that i succumbed to my fears… so i let pride rule my decision and i stayed. i suffered but fortunately, i survived.

but now, i’m in one of the most important crossroads of my life yet again… i need to decide what is really BEST for me… i need to make a decision and i need to make it now. will i or will i not?

sacrifice… sometimes you need to sacrifice the things you love because you know that there is no other way… for me, i don’t think i will be able to continue working with SOME of the people in the office now. i just can’t. i have no taste for lying, deceitful and manipulative people who would do anything to get up the career ladder. i have to break away and leave. if not sooner, then later.

as much as i hate for other people to influence my decisions, i truly think it’s time that i start my own journey - to pack my bags, to shoulder the burden and to start walking to that road less travelled. praying all the way that i will not breakdown and fall…

whew! a lot of things have happened since the last time i updated my blog… would you believe that it had been 3 weeks since i last created a new post? wehehe..

so what has been happening in my puny life? well a lot actually, i’ll just write bits and pieces of everything because i don’t think one blog will be able to accommodate everything i have to say!

1. i’ve went to china for 9 days with my family. shucks… i thought i will be able to take a break from work and relax but NO… the hassle of going on a tour is that you don’t control your own time, you have to comply with the tour’s scheduled time which includes wake up calls, travel time, cr breaks, lunch, dinner, etc! it totally sucked! my idea of a perfect vacation is a very relaxed one… no schedules, no rush hour, no nothing… just relaxing and bumming around. wait!!! there’s more, can you just imagine how hard it is to stay in 5 different hotels in a span of 9 nights??? huh??? can you? well, it’s no party i tell you… it’s like everytime we got to a hotel, we had to take our things out of our luggages, then put them right back… Golly! totally not fun! plus we got on a plane almost every other day and we were on a bus most of the time! never have i been soooo stressed out on travelling. (saguitarians love to travel - and i do, but not like this trip… argh!). But the good news is… (halleluhah, there’s a good news) i loved the places we went to… sure you’ll get tired of the temples-that-look-alike, the food (chinese food for 9 days! barf!), the yucky comfort rooms which they call WC (dont ask me why, i still haven’t figured out this one) (yucky talaga because you have to squat to pee.. yuck!!!!), and the travel; but you’ll learn to love the culture… i learned how to appreciate it and it gives me a good feeling knowing that i’m learning more about my roots… and i love the weather… 7 degrees celcius?? nice! =D hehe so all in all, i’ll give my china travel a 6.

2. hmmm… that was long… i’ll try to shorten the other parts of this post… i also went to galera with my boyfriend last Sunday. it was actually our first trip together and well, i loved it. sure, i wasn’t able to swim, nor was i able to do some of the water activities because of reasons only the brave women in the world will know, hehe. but, i loved it… my teddy bear and i were able to bond and spend quality time together… and the weather was great! no rain. =D i didn’t even let the asshole owner of the white nipa hut resort ruin my trip! would you believe that i made a reservation which was confirmed by the owner just to realize the last minute that there was no vacancy because we did not make any downpayment? and i was already on the boat to galera that time. talk about inconsiderate selfish assholes!!! ggrrrr… so we ended up renting a very expensive space. not bad but could’ve been prevented.. hmmm… my galera trip was an 8… =D

3. my college friend emer, together with my boyfriend and myself went to visit my baby in fairview. it was the first time i visited my baby and well, i was so excited i wanted to bring toys for her! she was adorable… she’s so cute i didn’t want to let her go! good thing is i only have to wait 2 or 3 more weeks to finally bring her home! i already bought some stuffs for her… i’m THAT excited!

4. problems at work that were not my fault.. well maybe partly my fault because i went on leave. BUT, i won’t be naive and say that it was entirely my fault! because in the first place, it’s not my fault that people can be such know-it-alls… ggrrr.. just thinking of what had happened is enough to make my blood boil… hay dont want to say anything else but GET OUT OF MY LIFE! there that says it all. hay! i’ve been trying to get along with everyone at work but it is getting really hard. especially when some of them are very hardheaded, stubborn and overconfident people. PATHETIC… what a waste of time.

well, i guess that’s it for now… i’ll try to upload some pictures next time. =D tata…